Part 4: Writing a New Story

There’s a moment in every growth journey when something shifts, not because your circumstances change, but because you change. For me, that moment came at a Maxwell Leadership Team conference, sitting in a room full of people who had dedicated their lives to personal growth and leadership.

John Maxwell had just released The Best Story Ever Told, and during one of his talks, he asked the audience a simple, but piercing question:

“Who’s the author of your story?
Is it you?
Or are you on the sidelines, letting someone else write it for you?”

I can’t explain why those words hit me the way they did, but I’ll never forget the jolt I felt in my spirit. It was as if time paused and God leaned in to ask me directly:

“Stephanie, whose story are you living?”

And in that moment, the truth came rushing in:
I wasn’t the author of my story.
In fact, I wasn’t even holding the pen.
I didn't realize I had a story or believe my story mattered.

That moment exposed something I hadn’t wanted to admit. Somewhere along the way, I had stopped living with intention. I had become so consumed with being helpful, supportive, and dependable that I forgot I was also called to be whole, to grow, to dream, to lead. I had settled into a script written by the needs of others, and I called it humility. I called it sacrifice. I even thought I was being faithful.

The truth was, I had been living reactively, not purposefully.

Now, don’t misunderstand me, serving others is a calling, and I still believe deeply in helping wherever God leads. That hasn’t changed. But what I’ve learned is this:
There’s a big difference between faithfully following God’s voice and losing yourself in everyone else’s demands.

One leads you closer to purpose.
The other leaves you wondering if you have one.

For years, I measured my worth by what others needed from me. When they were happy, I felt seen. When they weren’t, I felt invisible. And slowly, I stopped asking myself what I needed, what I wanted, or what I was made for. I was living in the margins of other people’s lives, trying to earn a place in their story, rather than owning the story God had written for me.

But here’s the beauty of God’s grace:
Even when we forget we have a story, He doesn’t.

That day at the conference wasn’t just convicting, it was empowering. Because when I realized I had stepped out of my own life, I also realized I could step back in.

I could pick up the pen.

I could start living with clarity and courage.

I could write a new story, not from scratch, but from truth.

And let me tell you, that shift didn’t happen overnight. I had to do the work. I had to unpack a lot of false beliefs, old habits, and broken patterns. I had to go back to the Word and I had to remember who I was. I had to ask tough questions, have hard conversations, and make brave decisions.

But something beautiful began to happen:
The more I embraced my story, the more I saw God’s fingerprints all over it.

The helping. The hurt. The heartbreak. The healing.
He hadn’t missed a single chapter.
And He was inviting me to live it fully.

So here’s my question for you:
Whose story are you living? 

Are you showing up every day out of duty… or out of purpose?
Are you holding the pen… or waiting for someone else to hand it to you?
Are you playing a background role… in the story God designed for you to lead?

Friend, you have a story.
And your story matters.

You were never meant to disappear behind the scenes of your own life. You were created to reflect God’s glory, not just through what you do for others, but through who you are in Him.

It’s not too late to pick up the pen.
It’s not too late to write a new chapter.
And it's not too late to remember, your story matters. 

Reflection Prompt:
Have you been living your life as the main character or have you stepped into the background of someone else’s story? What would it look like for you to pick up the pen again?